May 07, 2002

Well, I did it. With suggestions from many of you, I compiled a list of telephone-related songs (internet-related songs: Brittney Cleary's "IM Me," The Artist Formerly Known As The Artist Formerly Known As Prince's "www.emale.com," the modem noise in the Breeders' "Cannonball"). I decided, for whatever reason, not to count They Might Be Giants' various Dial-a-Song jingles. I'm probably leaving out the most obvious songs. You send 'em, I'll post 'em.

Public Enemy -- "9-1-1 Is a Joke"

Jim Croce -- "Operator (That's Not the Way It Feels)"

Blondie -- "Hanging on the Telephone"

Blondie -- "Call Me"

Blondie -- "Poets Problem" ("You will write your number on the wall / I will not be there when you call")

Electric Light Orchestra -- "Telephone Line"

Meri Wilson -- "Telephone Man"

New Edition -- "Mr. Telephone Man"

ABBA -- "Ring Ring" ("Ring, ring, why don't you give me a call? / Ring, ring, the happiest sound of them all")

Tommy Tutone -- "867-5309"

Wilson Pickett -- "634-5789 (Soulsville, USA)"

Chuck Berry -- "Come On" ("Ev'ry time the phone rings, sounds like thunder / Some stupid jerk tryin' to reach another number")

The Partridge Family -- "Echo Valley 2-6809"

That Dog -- "Westside Angst" ("What about me, GTE? / Why ya gotta change my 213?")

Faster Pussycat -- "Bathroom Wall"

Pete Shelley -- "Telephone Operator"

Kraftwerk -- "The Telephone Call"

Todd Rundgren -- "Hello, It's Me" (never explicitly described as a telephone call, but what else could it be?)

Genesis -- "I Got a Line on You"

Pink Floyd -- "Nobody Home"

Prince -- "The Ballad of Dorothy Parker" ("The phone rang and she said / Whoever's calling can't be as cute as U")

Steely Dan -- "Rikki Don't Lose That Number" (which may or may not refer to a phone number)

Lou Reed -- "New York Telephone Conversation"

X -- "Your Phone's Off the Hook, But You're Not"

The Replacements -- "Answering Machine"

The Jags -- "Back of My Hand" ("I got your number / written on the back of my hand")

Modern Lovers -- "I'm Straight" ("This phone call today concerns Hippie Johnny...")

Ray Parker Jr. -- "Ghostbusters" ("Who you gonna call?")

R.E.M. -- "Star 69"

Toto -- "Hold the Line"

Stevie Wonder -- "I Just Called to Say I Love You"

City Boy -- "5705"

Sleater-Kinney -- "Call the Doctor"

The White Stripes -- "Hello Operator"

The Clash -- "London's Burning" ("Dial 99999")

Johnny Thunders -- "Chinese Rocks" ("Somebody called me on the phone / They said hey, is Dee Dee home?")

Bob Dylan -- "Highway 61" ("...a thousand telephones that won't ring")

Morrissey -- "Dial-a-Cliche"

Love -- "The Red Telephone"

Rival Schools -- "Travel by Telephone"

Tammy Wynette & George Jones -- "The Telephone Call"

Claude Francois -- "Le Telephone Pleure"

Special thanks to Simon Morris, Michael Temple, Jim Scileppi, Daniel Briney, Karen Kim, Chris Sweet, Laurie Edwards, Chris Bickel, Daniel Reifferscheid, and Dainon Moody.